The pithy, opinionated, and sometimes brutally frank Heinz-Ulrich von Boffke challenges average guys to live a life less ordinary and embrace classic style in the broadest sense. it's time to rise above the trite, the boring, the predictable, the mundane, the banal, and the commonplace. It's time to stop behaving like barnyard animals at the trough and leave behind the perpetually sloppy man-child aesthetic of the last two decades or so. It's time to learn once again how to present and conduct yourself like an adult with some grooming, finesse, and sophistication. And here is where you can learn how.

Sunday, September 7, 2014

Get a Grip on Yourself!

Tapping or drumming one's fingers on the table is just one common (and irritating) type of fidgeting.

If you'll pardon the blatant Seinfeld reference, are you master of your domain?  Ok, ok. . .  Settle down class.  Class?  Class?  Class!  Kidding aside, I'm talking about your ability to sit still whether you are alone or with others.  An inability to do so is as annoying in adults as it is in children, and fidgeting instantly betrays intense nervousness and uncertainty on your part.  

Besides learning how to dress and conduct himself more nicely, an average guy working to kick up his everyday style should also ask himself, "Am I able to sit still?"  If, after careful reflection, the honest answer is no, then here is a short list of typical nervous behaviors that you'll want to get under control:


1) Tapping or drumming your fingers incessantly on tabletops.

2) Biting or picking at your nails or cuticles.

3) Sniffing or clearing your throat constantly

4) Playing with your hair, face, or nose (ick!).

5) Bouncing or tapping your foot on the floor.

6) Waving your foot or lower leg when your legs are crossed.

7) Wiggling both knees back and forth rapidly when seated (as though your are three and desperately need to visit the bathroom).

8) Cracking your knuckles.

9) Clicking a ball point pen or drumming with a pencil.

10) Twiddling your fingers and thumbs or playing with small stuff within arm's reach (Zippo cigarette lighters, jingling the change in your pocket, etc.).

11) Chewing on your lip or the inside of your cheek.

12) Picking at your clothing.


Without a doubt there are additional nervous habits that I'm not thinking of at the moment, but these dozen commonly observed activities provide a useful starting point if you determine that your are indeed a chronic fidgeter who needs to rein himself in.  Barring Restless Leg Syndrome or more serious mental health issues, you need to get a grip on yourself if any of these habits are familiar to you.   

And if this particular post itself seems a bit irritating and persnickety, remember, the devil is in the details.  A stylish, sophisticated adult male has control over himself.  He is able to sit still, giving the impression, at least, of being calm, cool, confident, and collected regardless of the place, time, or situation.  After all, it's hard to picture genuine cultural icons like Cary Grant, Paul Newman, Steve McQueen, Sean Connery, or Michael Caine, for example, fidgeting their ways through their movies. . .  or their personal lives.

-- Heinz-Ulrich

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