A Very Simple Step toward Greater Style. . .

Trust me. You don't want to be one of those guys who can't keep his gum in his mouth, or chew it quietly.

Here's a very simple tip for average guys who have set out to kick up their everyday style several notches. Best of all, it's inexpensive and easily accomplished. Are ya ready Steve? Andy? Mick? All right fellas. Let's goooooooooo!!!

If you are one of the legions of people who insist on having a wad of gum stuck in the side of your mouth -- and if no one has told you before, it's a pretty tacky and cheap habit to begin with -- chew it quietly and keep it in your mouth. Anyone over the age of seven who cracks and pops his gum is annoying in the extreme, even if others around you are polite enough not to say anything. That sort of thing is not even cute in children if we are perfectly frank with ourselves. And it's also just plain gross for us to treat people to the sight of that chewed up, rubbery, neon wad of stuff in our mouths. As inconsiderate and offensive as, for example, taking off your shoes and socks on an airplane and resting your feet against the nearest bulkhead.

Nope. Where Bazooka, Juicy Fruit, and Dentyne are concerned, my maternal grandmother used to advise, "If you insist on chewing gum, then go to your room and close the door where no one can see or hear you." And that's not just solid advice for job interviews and office etiquette either. Fewer things spoil the overall effect of a handsome and well-dressed man than when he tosses a piece of gum or five into his gaping maw and begins chewing vapidly away on his cud. Yep. Cheap and tacky. And you don't want to venture anywhere near that territory.

Since we take a holistic approach to everyday style here at The Average Guy's Guide to Classic Style, and acknowledge that the somewhat nebulous concept of style is about much more than our clothes, accessories, and hair, let's make a concerted effort to keep that gum in our mouths where it belongs and keep it quiet, guys. Assuming we refuse to kick the habit altogether. But I hope, Bazooka Joe, that you might try.

-- Heinz-Ulrich

The Pleasaures of a Well-trained Dog. . .

A few final photographs from my visit to my sister in Washington, D.C. last week. These include one of 'Mr. Beau,' my sister's meticulously trained and truly wonderful Doberman, another of my sister, second cousin, step-father, and yours truly on the steps of the church outside Lexington, North Carolina just after our late mother's interment service, two of me solo at the National Cathedral, and a final one of my sister and me hamming it up during a long evening walk the day before I returned to Michigan. My sister routinely walks to the cathedral, about three blocks from her place, to enjoy the grounds and gardens. The Bishop's Garden, in particular, is a place she likes to sit for quiet contemplation and internal dialogues with our late maternal grandparents and mother, very much in keeping with the Episcopal side of things. Our grandfather, who was raised Methodist, became an Episcopalian when he married our grandmother. Before you ask, I am not sure tha

Avoid Careless Chatter. . .

E specially about the personal details of our lives. There is a lot that OUGHT to be kept more private in 2022 than has become the accepted norm for many. With the conscious and intentional cultivation of classic style in mind, however, we want to avoid oversharing and keep a bit more of ourselves to ourselves. Exactly what personal information and how much of it to keep private seems to be a slippery concept though. Here’s my take based on what I was told and observed as a child and young person at home. Basically, one should keep oneself to oneself in all respects (finances, personal worth, accomplishments, politics, sex, dirty laundry, etc.). As my late father used to advise when we were very small, and I am talking preschool and kindergarten, there were particular subjects that were not discussed outside the immediate family. There is a time and place for sharing certain details of one’s life, but most of the time, those should be played very close to the chest,

Main Line SportsmanDecember 5, 2013 at 11:20 AM
I like the "Ballroom Blitz" reference. The band was Sweet is I recall correctly.
WSTKS-FM WorldwideDecember 5, 2013 at 2:23 PM
Good call, MLS! Sweet's best tune among several other good ones. It seemed like a good way to start today's style rant.

Best Regards,

Heinz-Ulrich von B.
AnonymousDecember 5, 2013 at 3:59 PM
This is an excellent point. I have tried to instil into my children how to shake hands properly (firm but not too firm, laser like eye contact), be overdressed more often than not, and anytime you appear in public (especially in any official capacity) do not have gum in your mouth.

Dr. C.P.
WSTKS-FM WorldwideDecember 5, 2013 at 5:05 PM
I wish there were more parents like you, Dr. C.P. Socially, we might be in a slightly better place at this point in history. My own father refused to buy my sister and me gum in any form and would routinely makes us get rid of it if we turned up with some in our mouths. My mother was more subtle in her approach, but both parents absolutely detested chewing/bubble gum.

Best Regards,

Heinz-Ulrich von B.

Classic Style

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